Ross was born in April 1947 and grew up in California. She has always told stories, even as a very young child. Ross attended Portland State University, graduating in 1973. After two degrees (biology and psychology), a marriage, and trying to split her time between her career as a chiropractor and her first child, she decided to settle down to write professionally.

Around this time, she became friends with Marion Zimmer Bradley. When Marion was asked to edit the first Sword and Sorceress, Ross submitted a short story for the anthology, "Imperatrix" (1984). "Imperatrix" became her first published short story, under her married name of Deborah Wheeler. Deborah Wheeler continued to write for years, producing a number of short stories and two novels, Jaydium and Northlight, through DAW books.