Chapter One

To: All Employees of the New York Journal Fr: Charity Webber Re: Company Holiday Party

Just a reminder that all departments will close at 4:30 p.m. today so that employees can get an early start on their holiday merrymaking. We hope to see all of you at Les Hautes Manger (57th and Madison) for cocktails and hors d'oeuvres (not to mention entertainment by the nationally acclaimed Magical Madrigals) from 4:30 to 8:00 p.m. All you need to bring is your holiday cheer!

Charity Webber

New York Journal Events Coordinator

To: Charity Webber Fr: Natasha Roberts Re: Holiday Party

Char -

How in the hell did you get old "Pinchpenny" Peter Hargrave to shell out the bucks for a swank shindig at a top restaurant like Les Hautes Manger? Last year's Christmas party was in the Senior Staff Dining Room, where the refreshments consisted of nonalcoholic eggnog and pigs- in-a-blanket. Now suddenly we're having cosmos and salmon tartare someplace where ties and jackets are required? What gives?

Did you talk the guys in tech support into diverting funds from office supplies into the events budget again? Char, don't you remember what happened last time you did that? You ended up spending five Saturday nights in a row watching Robot Wars with the likes of Danny "When's the last time you updated your software" Carmichael. Do I need to remind you that Danny volunteered to marry you when you had too many rum and Diet Cokes and were bewailing the fact that there are no good men left out there? I believe he said that the two of you could live in his mother's basement in Long Island until he'd saved up enough to get his own place....

Didn't you swear to me then that you would never again exceed your departmental budget? Didn't you? Just wondering,

Nat

To: Natasha Roberts Fr: Charity Webber Re: Holiday Party

Shut up! I told you never to mention the Robot Wars incident to me again. That was years ago.

Well, okay, two years ago. Still, don't you think I've learned my lesson?

Besides, sometimes I think I did the wrong thing, turning Danny down. He would have made an excellent husband. I mean, at least if I ever needed my hard drive defragmented, I'd know who to ask.

And I hear his mother is a great cook.

In any case, it wasn't "Pinchpenny" Peter Hargrave's idea to have the party at Les Hautes Manger. It was his nephew Andrew's idea. You know Andrew's taken over day-to-day operations since his uncle's bypass surgery. Everybody's saying Mr. H is going to announce his retirement after New Year's, and that Andrew will be taking over as the new chief exec.

I just hope nothing goes wrong tonight. It'd be just my luck to screw up my first party under the new chief exec. I really want to make a good first impression on the new boss....

Although I don't see what was so bad with last year's party. I happen to like pigs-in-a-blanket.

Oh my gosh! An e-mail from the soon-to-be new CEO himself! Gotta go -

Char

To: Charity Webber Fr: Andrew Hargrave Re: Tonight

Just a quick note to let you know how much I appreciate the great job you've done planning this year's holiday party. I know it must have been a lot more difficult for you to set up than in previous years when the event was held in the Senior Staff Dining Room.

But I think having the party off-site will be a real morale booster for the staff, who certainly deserve it after all the hard work they've put in this year, outselling the Chronicle for the first time in the Journal's history. Les Hautes Manger is one of the best restaurants in New York and I'm hoping the staff will appreciate it, as well.

I look forward to meeting you tonight. I've heard nothing but great things about you from my uncle, and am glad I can count on you to provide a memorable and smooth-running event for our hardworking staff.

Andrew Hargrave

To: Natasha Roberts Fr: Charity Webber Re: Holiday Party

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! He's counting on me to provide a memorable and smooth-running event for our hardworking staff! He's looking forward to meeting me! What if I screw it up??? What if I make a bad first impression?

Oh, God, why me????

C

To: Charity Webber Fr: Natasha Roberts Re: Holiday Party

What could go wrong, you schmo? You've only done a million of these things since you started working in this godforsaken hellhole. So what's the problem?

And how could you make a bad first impression? You know perfectly well everybody loves you. They can't help it, you're one of those types. You know, all bubbly. What are you worried about?

Oh, wait a minute.... This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that you and Andrew Hargrave have already MET, does it? Didn't you run into him once last month, down at the newsstand? Oh my God, I remember now: You were buying Skittles, and so was he, and the two of you laughed about it, but you were too nervous to introduce yourself because he was so tall and cute and single and had a really nice butt, or something, so you ran away?

Is THAT where all this worry about making a good impression is coming from? Because you're warm for his form? Nat

To: Natasha Roberts Fr: Charity Webber Re: SHUT UP

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

This has nothing to do with that. Well, not the butt part. He's just REALLY cute. And nice. And he likes Skittles! Who else do you know who likes Skittles? I mean, besides me? No one!

Oh, God, this party just HAS to go well....

I have to write him back and I want my response to sound witty and professional yet breezy and casual. But now all I can think about is his butt. Thanks a lot.

C

To: Charity Webber Fr: Natasha Roberts Re: No, YOU shut up

Hee hee.

Nat

To: Andrew Hargrave Fr: Charity Webber Re: Tonight

Dear Mr. Hargrave,

Thank you so much for your note. Please don't worry at all about the party tonight. I'm sure it's going to go well. The staff at Les Hautes Manger seem eminently professional, and almost everyone here at the paper is delighted that we won't be having pigs-in-a-blanket again this year.

Looking forward to meeting you as well, Charity Webber

Events Coordinator

To: Charity Webber Fr: Andrew Hargrave Re: Tonight

Glad to hear it! And please, call me Andrew. See you tonight! A